Dear Susan: Yours, Kiki
I know how sad you are. But you must know that, Liu Xiang is much sadder than you as himself, because he is an athlete who is taking everybody's hope on.
Have I told you the story about my elder sister? Yes, she is an excellent high-jump athlete. But there was a sad story in her history. When she was 12 years old, she joined a big match in her city for her school, everyone in the school believed that she could win and so did she. But she hurt herself the day before the match began. No one knew that except herself, so she decided to hide the truth. Oh dear! How silly she was! She bearded pain till the match began, but she couldn't run or jump, so she had to withdrew from the match with tears. Everyone in the school couldn't believe that!
When we were watching TV and saw Liu Xiang withdrew from the Beijing Olympic Game, she told me she could understand him. And she told me:" We believe that we can look down at the height, but at last, we have to look up at the height. No one knew felt serious heart ache when I made up my mind. Liu Xiang must be sadder than I, You know."
So Susan, don't cry any more. Let's understand him, OK? You are a kind girl, I am sure you will understand what I mean- as his fans, Susan, you must be confident in him.
文章改过可以这样:
评析: 文章写得不错,没有的错误,就是语句多了,能把意思表达得再清晰简洁些就好了!