习作原文
Many people want to have their own car, for they can go where they want, when they want, and they also can take friends places. They think if they use public transportation to go to somewhere, it will wait a long time for the bus. Sometimes they need to transfer. It is very messy and waste time.
In my own point, I think use public transportation to go to school and work is a good idea, because if we drive in our own car, we will need to be very carefully and we usually need to pay money for gas, repairs, and insurance, but if we choice using public transportation to go to school and work, it will be safer and save money. This is the main reason.
Some times if you want to go to somewhere drive in your own car, you will have to worry about traffic, and when you are there, you may find that you can not find park, whereas if you use public transportation to go to somewhere, you will have free time to go to sleep, listen to music and read books or newspapers.
If most people use public transportation to get to work, then it will are less and less cars, and it will lead to less pollution of the environment.
So I think use public transportation to go to school and work is a good idea.
批 改 老 师
评 分
85分
级 别
优秀
评 语
批改：
1. for they can go where they want, when they want, and they also can take friends places.本句话表达有误，when they want表时间状语从句如果单独出现的话容易造成句子语法的误解，最好放在for引导的原因状语从句里，即for when they want, they can go where they want, 另外，后边，应该加介词，即take friends to places.
2. it will wait a long time for the bus.本句话估计是笔误，主语不是it,而是they.
3. It is very messy and waste time. 前后最好一致，即都用形容词，wasteful.
4. I think use public transportation to go to school and work is a good idea, 本句话宾语从句的主语应该是一个非谓语结构，不能用动词原形，即using.
5. we will need to be very carefully 应该是形容词。
6. if we choice using public transportation 词性选择错误，应该用动词。
7. Some times if you want to go to somewhere drive in your own car, 应该是非谓语，driving.
8. then it will are less and less cars, 首先will 后应该是be原形；另外本句话最好用there be句型。
评析：
全文整体内容充实，而且一个两点是作者阅历很广，对相关知识了解甚多，比如车的保险，公共交通的问题等。但是，语法错误较多，希望继续加油！
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